I’ve mentioned before that I have no desire for Colaspot to become a “Hey, check out the latest funny video making its rounds on the internet” site. And yet, every now and then, something fascinating comes along (like the Pokemon Kid) that I must share. While St. Patrick’s Day has come and gone, this video will always be timely in my eyes, as it is a clear reminder of why we should be in a constant state of fear over the well-being of mankind. Before I go any further, please stop what you’re doing and take a look at this news clip from an NBC affiliate in Mobile, Ala-BAM-a! Go on - I’ll wait.

You done? Great. Here are some quick reactions: 1.) “Who all seen the leprechaun? Say YEEEAAHHH!” Careful sir, you’ll frighten the leprechaun away with you disdain for the English language. 2.) “My theory is it’s casting a shadow from the other limb.” Look, as preposterous as it is for a leprechaun to exist and climb a tree, I find it more plausable than the shadow of a tree limb looking like a leprechaun. 3.) As funny as it is, doesn’t it seem odd to hear “crackhead” on the news? 4.) Was the sketch drawn by someone who has a rare disorder that makes them unable to see noses and mouths? And newscasters- no need to call it an amateur sketch. I’m pretty sure “amateur” is an unnecessary adjective. 5.) Even if I go along with the idea that a leprechaun lives in a tree in Mobile, Alabama, I can’t overlook that given a leprechaun’s small stature, that’s one enormous flute. 6.) The leprechaun only comes out at night? Special gear to protect against attacks? It’s a leprechaun, folks, not a midget-werewolf. 7.) Clearly, that last man wants some gold.